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Rulekeep

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Everything posted by Rulekeep

  1. So in case anybody is keeping score, EJ Party is over 100,000 views, a far first in front of "My Hero" with 8,000. 

  2. Rulekeep

    NICE.

    Yes, yes, no, and it's not worth the effort.
  3. Rulekeep

    NICE.

    I have a mentor/partner here in town (one who finally got people in touch with me) and one in a neighboring town (the one who caused this landslide)
  4. Rulekeep

    NICE.

    It's June. This may not be very significant for those of you who dont live in a wasteland excuse for a capital city but for those of us who do it is VERY SIGNIFICANT. High school baseball has just ended, little league is ending, and Legion is starting. I have not been assigned any games this season. At all. Not even that groddy softball thing. Most of the assigning is handled by one guy, a substitute teacher who over the winter had some "personality issues" with me (hit up the like button if you relate lmao) and so I figured I was just being ignored unless I demanded for games. I work at the Kroger in town and because this city is pathetically small I see everybody, including the frighteningly intense LL coach who gave me lots of strike zone lessons I did not want or need. He promised he'd get me on the list because the minors kids like me (GROSS) and I was never emailed...then yesterday I saw my high school mentor at the same store and he asked me why I wasn't umpiring and I just said I hadn't been emailed. He said he would get in touch with Mr. Bigassigner and LO, there is that email. Telling me I won't be umpiring. Apparently my """mentor""" in a neighboring town (so many blue polos) "dug up some dirt" (don't ask me what it was. I am not at the liberty to discuss it on a thread not to mention its been requested that I don't) when I was there playing with the high school (what a loser-explains why he never called me back) and passed it along to Mr. Bigassigner. To be blunt, he completely f---ed me, to the point where other people couldn't add me to their crews on our lil spreadsheets. His excuse was "after I saw what you're like off the field, I decided you weren't a good umpire" (who cares) and "we had enough umpires already" which was such a horrible fib I was tempted to send him pictures of the flyers all round town begging for *VOLUNTEER* umpires. Instead I opened a side savings account to save my measly Kroger money to attend the biggest, most prestigious, most chattered about clinic I could by 2017. Since I lost a year of experience anyways.
  5. Headed to baseball practice, complaining about the rain, and then-
  6. Just got jersey 53 on my school's team. Coach is apparently trying to get me beaned as many times as possible. 

  7. Rulekeep

    Cell Phones

    There's a new name for the local little league installation...the only sports fan that goes harder than the fanaticy baseball parents are the rabid high schoolers on Saturday nights.
  8. Rulekeep

    Cell Phones

    Then games would be a lot smoother. What's that thing BigUmpire used to say? "If you have 100 monkeys misbehaving, KILL ONE, and watch the rest of them shape up"?
  9. Rulekeep

    Cell Phones

    One of my colleagues in Little League is a very well known cop around here and has made very similar remarks.
  10. Rulekeep

    Cell Phones

    9mm, a wrist brace, and a couple minutes at the range a month will shut down chirping REAL FAST.
  11. My hair is just overgrown...and the rain had washed the pomade out so it wasn't standing up.
  12. Rulekeep

    Cell Phones

    People get hurt doing everything possible to be safe. You can commit no mistakes and still fail. That is life, and when some stupid ass parent pulls a gun or a knife or a draino bomb because I won't talk to him, I'd like to keep mine. Your foolish umpire-puritan pride is not worth getting the crap beaten out of you in a parking lot.
  13. Dave Valle was pretty cool, too, I guess.
  14. We don't speak those words.
  15. All I can think is "in m'judgement"
  16. Ice hockey BUT my league had an hour of ice time so we'd just drop the puck and play until somebody puked or the rink staff kicked us off and thirty minutes in myself and the other tendy would switch creases.
  17. No scoreboard in pick up league. My godfather tracks my stats for me. Because he's not a jerk. Unlike another washed out hotshot skater I know.
  18. 1/23/16 First half: White team. Five shots. Three saves. (Including a kick save.) Second half: Black team. Five shots. One save. Notes: Played a Fairbanks Nanooks Alumni team that was in town that somehow didn't get the memo about no full slapshots. My neckguard is the seventh level of hell.
  19. They're called butterfly goalies...my my, I expect more out of a former hockey player, although, I suppose when you played hockey, Patrick Roy had not yet risen to fame and the goalies still played with magazines taped to their shins.
  20. As an up and coming stand up goaltender, I've decided to brag about record my statistics here for all of you to laugh at look at. (Since this most likely will be a "funny story" as well as off topic. ) 1/16/16 First half: Black team. Five shots. Two saves. Second half: White team. Nine shots. Six saves. Notes: Very sore. Can not walk without considerable pain. First game I've played since I was ten years old. Only fell backwards twice. Got stick stuck in net once.
  21. I should write a book about dumb ways teenage wanna-be athletes severely hurt themselves and make a whole chapter about my own misadventures on mats, bikes, grass, weight platforms, and now, on huge slabs of ice. I am a Very Angry Tendy. 

  22. it's somebody a Anglican priest appoints to take care of the church and the rectory. Traditionally they also took care of the graveyard and the corpses that went into it but since we don't have a graveyard I mostly do stuff like vacuum and shovel and lay ice melt and wash windows etc.
  23. Here's something I bet none of you have done-I just got installed as a sexton. (I mostly I shovel snow and clean the rectory windows.)
  24. "Antes del partido, comí unas bananas y mi jefe y companero Keith bebió jugo de pepino. Jody trabajó con nosotros pero a èl le dolió la cabeza aquel día en el partido de Sitka. Jody es un perdedor y un àrbito malo, así no me importo." Y en y en y en...

    1. gnhbua93

      gnhbua93

      Mi jefe y compañero Keith bebió jugo de pepino y yo comí unas bananas, antes del partido. Jody trabajo con nosotros  A él le dolía la cabeza aquel día en el partido en Sitka. Jody es un perdedor y un mal árbitro, así que no me importo.

    2. Rulekeep

      Rulekeep

      It's supposed to be trabujó...I am not working with Jody right this absolute minute. Jody WORKED with us, but hurt his head. So also dolío. :/

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