Diva Coaches

[Umpire in Chief]

Here's the funniest thing I have ever seen on the field.

This was youth recreation ball for 12 y/o through the local parks and recs. These are generally the worse deviant of baseball you can imagine. The only saving grace of these games is that they pay well and it's cash on site. A lot of higher level guys turn these assignments back.

I call for the coaches for the plate conference. From one of the teams comes two ladies dressed in high heals, ultra tight jeans, all decked out in jewelry, and expensive designer handbags. I looked at my partner like am I on some hidden camera show, but continue on.

Note: This is not a knock on female coaches. I've dealt with a number of female coaches in the past who were as good if not better than many of their male counterparts.

Her team comes to bat and here is the lady shuffling to the 3rd base box in her heals and talking away on her cell phone. I walk up to her and tell her she cannot be using her cell on the field and she complies. I call for the first batter (This league does not allow batters to warm up either on the field or off). The kid comes up and is not wearing a helmet. I kindly remind him that he has to have a helmet.

The coach shuffles down in her heels to me all waving, shaking her finger and rolling her head and neck, "uh-uh, uh-uh He aint going to wear no helmet" and her friend comes strolling in from first base. I explain he has to be wearing a helmet with ear protection. She asks if I'd seen the helmets the city had given them and how dirty and disease ridden they were. I explain that we cannot play baseball unless they are wearing helmets.

The Diva coach, grabs a helmet out of the dug out and shows me how dirty it is and ask, "Are you going to be responsible if our kids get AIDS and die?"

I'm trying hard not to start laughing my arse off. My partner comes up and explains they can use Lysol or go to Dicks and get some sporting equipment cleaner, but in the mean time they can wear their hats under the helmets if they are that concerned.

The coach is still giving me a difficult time, and I get to the point that were not getting anywhere. This had now taken nearly 5 min. I tell the ladies, "I don't care how but these kids must be wearing helmets, or we will have a forfeit. You have to make a decision now if we are going to be playing or not."

We get the game underway and there are a few minor issues during the game. And the play is as bad as we expected. Thank god for drop dead time limits.

They went ahead and started the game

[LMSANS]

Here's the funniest thing I have ever seen on the field.

This was youth recreation ball for 12 y/o through the local parks and recs. These are generally the worse deviant of baseball you can imagine. The only saving grace of these games is that they pay well and it's cash on site. A lot of higher level guys turn these assignments back.

I call for the coaches for the plate conference. From one of the teams comes two ladies dressed in high heals, ultra tight jeans, all decked out in jewelry, and expensive designer handbags. I looked at my partner like am I on some hidden camera show, but continue on.

Note: This is not a knock on female coaches. I've dealt with a number of female coaches in the past who were as good if not better than many of their male counterparts.

Her team comes to bat and here is the lady shuffling to the 3rd base box in her heals and talking away on her cell phone. I walk up to her and tell her she cannot be using her cell on the field and she complies. I call for the first batter (This league does not allow batters to warm up either on the field or off). The kid comes up and is not wearing a helmet. I kindly remind him that he has to have a helmet.

The coach shuffles down in her heels to me all waving, shaking her finger and rolling her head and neck, "uh-uh, uh-uh He aint going to wear no helmet" and her friend comes strolling in from first base. I explain he has to be wearing a helmet with ear protection. She asks if I'd seen the helmets the city had given them and how dirty and disease ridden they were. I explain that we cannot play baseball unless they are wearing helmets.

The Diva coach, grabs a helmet out of the dug out and shows me how dirty it is and ask, "Are you going to be responsible if our kids get AIDS and die?"

I'm trying hard not to start laughing my arse off. My partner comes up and explains they can use Lysol or go to Dicks and get some sporting equipment cleaner, but in the mean time they can wear their hats under the helmets if they are that concerned.

The coach is still giving me a difficult time, and I get to the point that were not getting anywhere. This had now taken nearly 5 min. I tell the ladies, "I don't care how but these kids must be wearing helmets, or we will have a forfeit. You have to make a decision now if we are going to be playing or not."

We get the game underway and there are a few minor issues during the game. And the play is as bad as we expected. Thank god for drop dead time limits.

They went ahead and started the game

Please tell me the divas won:rolleyes:

[Tony B]

I hope you got some phone numbers out of the deal