Old Nr 24

I gotta get BlueinVa to explain it the next time I call a balk and the coach complains! Heck of a job, guy!

Nr,

I recommend hooking in with one of the local HS associations or such and acting as an evaluator and trainer. That way you are still in and around the game (just not on the field) and you can impart your knowledge and wisdom on other umpires that can use it.

I am considering doing just that, BT, providing I can work it into my unfortunately ever-expanding schedule. They say as we get older life slows down? Don't you believe it! It just takes longer to do everything, providing you can remember it at all, so I think life is more hectic. As for hanging 'em up, I actually considered moving up to the Carolinas first because while my knees are a problem, I am firmly convinced it was this Central Florida heat that drove me out of the game. I went from 6-7 games a week to needing 2 days to recover from a single afternoon game! The humidity and long summers just suck the life out of you when you are exerting yourself outside, and I don't know any way to go on the field but full-out.

But I will consider your suggestion seriously. I know I would enjoy being intimately involved again, and maybe all those years of balls and strikes, outs and safes can be put to some use.

And might I add this is proving to be a wonderful site full of interesting people and interesting reading. Be it 8-10 year-olds who can't catch a cold or hit the ground with their cap, high schoolers and AAU'ers whom you would love to buy for what they are worth and sell for what they think they are worth, collegians who are on the verge of either ending a baseball career or starting one at the professional level, and the coaches and managers of all kinds, there are no better people on earth than baseball people. I hate soccer and lacrosse, I tolerate basketball, I like football, I love hockey....but I LIVE BASEBALL!

Great post. I often wonder if coaches learn the same way we do. Being that once we kick a rule we never kick that same rule twice.

Actually, I wonder if some coaches ever learn anything! Most lower level coaches don't know the rules much at all and make no effort to learn them. As the level of competition goes up, some are good, but still most I've found don't know more than just the "surface" rules.

Amusing story about that point. Working the bases in a JV game and there was a swinging bunt to the first base side of the mound. F3 moves toward it, then realizes the pitcher has it and begins to retreat to the bag for the throw. But he's backing up, and as he catches the ball he trips and falls directly on his butt on the bag well ahead of the runner, whom I instantly call out. His coach comes out to argue the call, but before he can do it I hit him with "What's the difference between a foot and an ass?" He looks at me like I have two heads and again I asked, "What's the difference between a foot and an ass?" He asks me what the hell I'm talking about, and I explained that F3 had control of the ball and was touching the bag, albeit with his butt, before the runner reached the bag, and there is no difference between a foot and an ass! He laughed aloud and walked to the dugout.

That unexpected money is always nice, especially when you bust your butt to make the game in the first place. And sometimes it's almost forced on you.

My partner and I show up for an evening Legion game several years ago in Maryland. It's been drizzling on and off all day, and the sky is still gray and angry. We know this site is not the best in the county, so we are expecting a rain out call, but no. So we show up and the field is horrible! The plate area is sticky and soft, the base paths are terrible, and around the bases there is almost standing water! There is more rain forecast, so as we get to the plate conference I ask the home team manager if he would not prefer to call this one and reschedule. My partner and I will call it a night, and no pay necessary. You see, this league paid on the field BEFORE the game.

But he is insistent we can play, so I tell him (as tiny raindrops begin to fall on my face) that once we start the game is in our hands, and all decisions will be final. Well, the visiting team is pretty bad, and he sees an opportunity for an easy "W" in the books that will help him in the standings, so he agrees and still insists we play. As his pitcher is waming up the drizzle continues, and once more I give him an out, going to him and asking again if he doesn't want to just reschedule, and offering to give him back the fees! Nope, we're gonna play.

As I begin play the rain gets a bit harder. During the top of the first inning his pitcher slips with his plant foot, throws one somewhere over the backstop, and I just rolled my eyes at the home team manager and said, "Ball." First batter rolls out to second on a weak grounder that has a rooster tail behind it. Next batter strikes out because he can't get his footing and misses strike three by a mile. Third batter pops one up in the infield and the shortstop almost dropped it because of the rain in his face, but we have 3 outs.

First home team hitter takes about 2 minutes trying to get his footing, but he can't because the rain is now coming down harder, showing no sign of letting up. The pitcher delivers a fastball up and in, and the batter slips trying to avoid the ball, which misses his nose by inches. I raised my hands and called time, then informed the benches we are calling the game due to unplayable conditions. End of game.

And as my partner and I are leaving the field the home team manager comes up to me, and I'm ready for his load of crap. But he doesn't argue. He just asks, "Do we get a refund on the fees?" Yea, idiot, sure you do!

I never wore glasses when I was umpiring, but as I got older I found that while my normal vision was excellent, I did have to wear reading glasses. The condition is known as presbyopia - the inability to focus close up. But being an umpire, I was not about to let that stop me, and managed to handle lineup cards and such for many years without the reading glasses, just holding the cards at arm's length (someone told me my eyes were fine, but my arms were just too short!).

Finally during a night game (that's the worst, when there is no daylight!), my time had come. I simply could not read those lineup cards without glasses. So I got a pair of those "old granny glasses," the half-frame jobs, and stuck them in a pocket. I managed fine at first, but as it got darker I knew I was in trouble. And sure enough about the 5th inning one team decided to make some changes. I pulled out the lineup cards, then the glasses, slipped them on my nose, and heard the cat calls from both dugouts and the stands. Luckily I seemed to maintain a good rapport with most of the coaches and players, so I endured the hoots and hollers with good nature, smiled at everyone, made my changes, then slipped the glasses back into my pocket and called for play to begin.

It became almost a tradition around the leagues for everyone to come up with some new "insult" every time I pulled out those glasses, and some were extremely creative and amusing, but it was all in fun. Besides, if you can't take some needling you definitely DO NOT belong on a baseball field!

Funny stuff! Sometimes I guess the umpire just has to respond, and in my experience if that response is clever enough you get very little static about it. Along the same lines as having the best view, I once had a third base coach get on me about balls and strikes, nothing too loud or abusive, but griping on almost every strike call on one of his hitters. I ignored it for a couple of innings, then gave him the obligatory "stop sign" and told him that was enough, and even told him as much as he passed the plate headed for his dugout, still grumbling about the last pitch under his breath but so I could hear it, so he knew what I meant. Not an inning later he was even hotter about a couple of calls (perfect strikes in my mind, so you know they were good pitches!), and actually came about 50 feet down the line. That was it. I ambled out to meet him and said, "Man, you must have the best set of eyes in the world!" His reply was something like, "I can tell you they sure see better than yours!" So I quietly told him, "That's good. You shouldn't have any trouble finding your way to the parking lot," and tossed him.

Originally Posted by poppyfor3

As a contract killer, I make for an excellent umpire. When doing the plate, I carry 1 ball bag on my left and holster my Glock on my right side. I do not start the game with "Play". I simply fire a warning shot over my partner's head. Helps him focus and let's EVERYONE know that I am in charge. Absolutely no arguments, no check swing appeals, no nonsense at all. Games are surprisingly quick. No! I have never shot anyone during a game. Ammo is too expensive to waste.

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Poppyfor3, I used to work games in the Baltimore area, and one of the leagues we handled was a so-called "adult league," though not too many of the players acted as such, if you catch my drift. But they did take the games very seriously even if their skill level was not up to par.

My partner was catching hell during one game, and even after the game when we had changed and were exiting the dressing room, two guys from one team were intent on continuing their "discussion" about some of his calls. They followed as we walked to the car. My partner said not a word, but upon reaching his car he opened the trunk and motioned for the loudest of the two to come look. He quietly pointed to his Baltimore Police Department service weapon lying in the trunk, and when the guy got this frightened look on his face, my partner simply said, "Yep, in a New York minute, my man." End of discussion.

I have to agree, John, that no ejections in 4-5 years of work is not normal, and something you need to explore. Why no ejections? I feel sure from your post that coaches have "crossed the Rio Grande," so why didn't you dump them? It's been said here in other ways, but remember that if you are soft on ejections when they are warranted you not only make matters worse for yourself, but for other umpires in the league. The umpires as a group must "teach" the coaches where the lines are that they cannot cross. It makes for a better game for all concerned.

And remember, if it is done professionally and without malice or anger ("Any decision made in anger is usually wrong!"), there should be no lingering effects. I used to be a crew chief on a 3-man HS crew, and I took on a relatively new umpire one year. He ultimately tossed one manager, and as fate would have it, my crew worked the very next game at that manager's home field. We rode together, and on the way this guy was worried about handling the manager during this game. At the plate conference he literally cringed as the manger approached, but was quickly put at ease when the manager smiled and said, "Hey, Chuck, good to see you again." And that was that, a lesson learned.

I agree that all umpires, no matter the level, need to be absolutely professional in dress, demeanor, knowledge, and technique. That for me is a given, and while I have worked with umpires I considered less than professional in one or more of these categories, if they work hard and are willing to learn I have no problem. After all, we are "professional amateurs," all of us.

It seems to me what we are talking about here (or in the beginning at least) are those guys who like to show off, to pose, to be over-officious, and in my opinion those are the men who give the job a bad name.

If you take the work seriously, be professional at all times, and do your job well, you can still enjoy the games, the players, the coaches, and the fans. You build your reputation through professionalism and hard work, and once you have that everyone relaxes. They know you, they know your work, they know where the invisible lines are, and the game and the job is then truly fun.

As for learning as you go, regardless of the level you work, I had a very wise umpire tell me early on in my "career" that we need to take something away from every partner we work with regardless of his experience level. We need to learn something from everyone, even if that is the devout promise that we will NEVER handle a situation like he did!

Thanks for the welcome, mstaylor. Never worked thru MSUA - almost exclusively with AAUA after going the AA County umpire route for a year. Some great baseball up in that neck of the woods, and I do miss it.

You sure that isn't an excerpt from a Yogi Berra press conference???

9.01.c -- "The Universal Equalizer"

And might I add, God bless you, Vito1! You play the game like I do. As the umpire in "Field of Dreams" said when the batter asked him about a warning for the pitcher throwing at his head, "Be careful you don't get killed."

We've all heard them...from the stands, from coaches, from players, and from fellow umpires. Some are brutal, some are senseless, but most are just downright funny. I'll begin this thread with one actually overheard by my partner during a private school league game in Maryland about 15 years ago.

My partner was a known joker, and as we were about to start a game on a very hot and muggy day, he sat a small jug of water just outside the backstop. Since the benches were very close, he said jokingly to a couple of players sitting there, "Now don't you drink that. That's 'umpire water' and if you drink it you'll go blind!"

We're in about the 4th inning when after a called strike that was "questionable at best," I see my partner behind the plate drop to his knees, pull off the mask, and put his hands over his face. I didn't see him get hit, but I was instantly concerned for his well being, and rushed to the plate as I called time. When I arrived I asked, "John, are you okay?"

When he looked up I realized for the first time he was not hurt, but laughing so hard he was about to cry. He slowly managed to stand, and we walk slowly toward first base as he tells me, "You know after that last call one of the players on the bench turns to his buddy and in a totally deadpan voice said, 'Must be the water.'"

See, even players have a good sense of humor.

Having spent some time in a manager/coach's uniform, as well as a long time wearing the blue, I think a man umpiring a game well in which one of his own is playing is the true test of umpire integrity. If you passed that test, the rest is easy, believe me! In fact, that's how I got into umpiring for pay. After doing volunteer work in our community for years, I was forced into calling a game in which my 12-year-old was playing. Bottom line is that he came to bat in the bottom of the last inning with a runner on second, 2 outs, and the game in the balance. With a 2-2 count I called him out on a slider that just nipped the outside corner. After the game another dad who was a member of the local umpire association approached me and said, "How about coming to a meeting? Any man who will do what you just did is our kind of umpire."

Hi, everyone.

Just stumbled onto this site and thought I would give it a shot. I guess more accurately I am not an "umpire," but a "former umpire" since my knees finally told me it was time to hang up the mask. That was about five years ago and I still can't get the enthusiam out of my system. You would think almost 30years would be enough, but I guess not.

Though I'm living in Florida now, and finished out my "career" on the field here, most of my umpiring was done in Maryland with Anne Arundel Umpire Association. I began volunteering for local community leagues as most of us did I guess, eventually gravitating to the local association and getting paid to do something I loved. What better situation?

So I am looking forward to exploring the site, learning new things, meeting new people, exchanging a few smiles and stories, and welcome any and all comments from other members.