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A Personal Revelation-I Sucked on Toast Saturday Night.....


Majordave
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So, this past Saturday I had some free time and no college or Men's League Assignments. I answered the call for umpires email from my high school assigner whom I had worked a total of three games for this season and took a JV DH Saturday morning and worked some youth baseball Saturday night. Here is my story......

I offered to work for my high school assigner on Friday morning when he sent out the call for weekend help by email and he rejected my offer saying "Its only JV and Freshman ball". I offered again and was ignored. I really wanted to umpire so I answered another assigner's Calling All Umpires Weekend Help Needed email and was rewarded with three Saturday evening games of 60' baseball for what was advertised as sixth graders. More on this later.

At around 10:30 PM after I return home from a dinner date with my significant other, the high school assigner has another calling all umpires, please! email. I answer him with a thanks a lot, you rejected me for JV tournament and I took some youth baseball. He emails me at 7 am with an offer of a JV DH at 9 am. I say what the hell and take it. It was great baseball. My partner, Chuck, whom I had never met was an accomplished high school and college referee who dabbles in umpiring but is not ambitious. He works sub-varsity just to help out the assigner, who also assigns all the basketball or most of it around here. Anyway, Chuck is a good balls and strilkes umpire. He isn't so sharp on mechanics but he is not into it and is not really seeking upward mobility as an umpire. He fills a need and a niche and he was a pleasure to work with. We each do a plate and our two full seven inning games are completed in less than three hours. We are feeling pretty good. It's upper 80's with a light breeze and we barely sweated and are done before noon. Nice.

I'm feeling pretty full of myself. I go get a nice BBQ Ribs lunch at The Woodyard in Merriam, KS which was recently featured, along with four other KC BBQ joints, on Anthony Bourdain's No Reservations TV Show on Travel Channel. I am really feeling flush.

Fast forward to 4 PM and game one of my three game kiddie-ball marathon. They switched my games from 12 year olds to ten year olds/4th graders. My partner is Jay, a mid-50's year old guy who admits he isn't a "real umpire" like me (his words) but he loves the kids and the game. He gets me oriented to how things work here at Baseball Disneyland of Johnson County, Kansas---Johnson County 3 & 2 Baseball, West Complex. (twenty-something fields of baseball mania. Everything from Machine pitch games played by mighty-mites to a college level 400' to centerfield field of dreams. This place is a madhouse of baseball parents (lots and lots and lots of hot baseball MILFs and every dugout has five or six Dad coaches it seems. All varieties of siblings, grandparents, mommies, daddies, aunts, uncles, etc. , "John the T-shirt guy", a retail store, traveling sales vendors of all things baseball.) I'm telling you it was the freakin' Disneyland of Baseball. I had never been in a site like this with so many fields and so many levels of baseball. Umpires ranging in age from kids that looked about 12 to 14 to guys like my partner, Jay in his mid to late 50s. I was overwhelmed.

On to our games....... I SUCKED. I would get in position on the bases and have to dodge throws from infielders, running back and forth across the dirt infield because the little tikes never threw the ball where the most likely play was. The runners all slide, every time. They all called time, all the time. The outfielders run the ball into the infield and want time, every time. They almost never caught a fly ball. Many botched "sure thing" double plays. Catcher's almost never blocking or even gloving the ball. I saw Jay take two direct hits to the groin by pitched balls that one of the little "squatty body" catchers (who looked like the new "Red" stormtrooper from Star Wars in his gear that was too big) never even touched with a mitt. I had a play at third where F5 put the glove down, with the ball int it, in time right on the bag. The runner slid into 3B hard and kicked once or twice to try and dislodge the ball. I waited and waited and then asked to see the ball and the kid finally showed it as they were both in a tangle from F5 falling over into the runner after the tag. Everyone, was yelling after I called the runner out. I thought my timing was great. I Waited, asked to see the ball, Got shown the ball and the coaches, fans and kids yelling why I couldn't make up my mind? Why did I take so long to make the call? Unbelievable!

Jay was overly demonstrative. Announced the count EVERY pitch, showed the count off to the side, EVERY pitch. Yelled "Full Count, 3 and 2, Full!" every time the count was full while showing the count in front and above his his head and to the side. Yelled "DEAD BALL!!!!" on every foul of any kind. Yelled "Foul Tip" on caught fouls. voiced and pointed to the right on swinging strikes and called strikes alike. Everything you think a Smitty would do. He was having a real ball though. It showed.

He talked to coaches, players, coached players, hammed it up with fans....... explained all calls in an overly loud voice. Called any pitch that crossed the plate a strike, whether or not it was hittable no matter how high it was over a kid's head. The world was his oyster as far as he was concerned.

My turn for the plate. I had the hardest time calling anything a strike. Several kids swing after I called ball on a pitch. The swing at balls that bounced. I awarded a base to a kid who was hit by a pitch that bounced and everyone went ape-crazy saying "it bounced! It bounced!" Amazing. One kid could actually throw knee high strikes but the catcher knocked them down into the dirt and when I called them strikes anyway, I thought I would never stop hearing the howling. They wanted me to call any pitch from TOP of head down over the plate or within a foot of the plate a strike. I finally got the hang of it. I think. I actually heard some fan say, out loud, that "this guy sucks, wish we had a "real umpire" like Jay on the plate!" Funny thing is, I actually agreed with them. I was not qualified or prepared mentally to work that level of ball after working mostly college and JUCO all spring. What a lesson in humility. I went from working a JUCO game with two pitchers who were drafted last year but didn't sign this past Sunday, week to 10 year olds Saturday night. What a week. What an experience. I love baseball and umpiring.

So, my hat is off to Jay, Chuck and all the other youth baseball and sub-varsity umpires out there who work their butts off and put up with a lot to try and make it a rewarding experience for the players. I had not been on a youth field for five or six years and just wasn't prepared. Doubt I can do it again. But........you never know.

Thanks for reading.

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Dave, it sounds like you were in way over your level on those games. A little more seasoning at the Mighty Mite level should do the trick! :fuel: :shrug:

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When I teach rookie kids the skills of umpiriing, I tell them they'll go right into the hardest game to call in organized baseball. 9-10's. Clueless players, coaches and parents. You have no idea where the ball is going, INT and OBS can be called on nearly every play, and the game seem to never, ever, end.

That's their incentive to get better, and get out of there. And it works.

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I was being evaluated on a HS game by my assignor and afterwards he asked me to work with a young probationary umpire doing a PONY league game the next night.......you know, show him the ropes, give him an idea about mechanics and consisitency, game management, blah....blah.....blah......

I agreed and the next night proceeded to have the same results that Dave had..........

Literally stunk up the joint............

been there done that brother dave....

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I call non-shaving (U10-U14) USSSA ball in the sticks of KC, and enjoyed the story. I have never been to 3&2, but have heard mixed reviews of the umpires...like any non-shaving complex. I think it's like any other sport, the older they get, the easier it gets. The plays made may be faster, but they are a lot more vanilla. All kinds of third world plays in kiddie-ball.

I go back and forth on strike zone, do I call anything I can get or do I use the traditional method of perception, catcher's ability, etc. With U10 ball like this, you just have to try to make them groan on strike calls instead of ball calls. Get all the strikes you can.

Man I'd love to move up in level to JV summer ball, legion, etc. 15 years of kiddie ball (half worked when i was a kid myself) are starting to wear me down, and I always wondered how well I'd do at the next level (everyone has a next level...mine just happens to be shaving age).

Funny thing, I found this quote when checking out your profile MajorDave:

Your story is another one to reinforce why I do not work any baseball played by players who don't shave. (stole that from someone else on one of these forums, Ozzy maybe?)

My advice is to get enough experience to get out of 60' baseball. Almost no one there knows the rules and they seem to be proud of it. All of their little darlings are future Major Leaguers and the only thing standing in the way is you, the umpire. I HATE, absolutely hate, what youth baseball has turned into in this country. I have umpired in 9 states so far and the problems are almost all the same and these forums keep on reminding me what it is like in other locales.

Thanks for this season's reminder for me to make sure I remind all seven or eight of my assigners that I will not work 60' baseball. Good luck and God Bless those of you that do. Not for me, anymore

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Yo, Squid, I didn't see the quote you mentioned. Was it something like "I don't do kiddie ball"? or "I only work games with players that shave or should shave"?

If not, please re-type it and throw it into my face at your leisure/pleasure. I'm sure I deserve it. I was and am humbled by the experience this past weekend.

Tonight, I worked a very good high school game, had plate, at Blue Valley Northwest hosting St. Thomas Aquinas. BVNW won 2-0. Less than 1.5 hours total. I am back in the saddle! Two fans, not sure which side, came up and said "great game blue" (I was wearing black but that doesn't matter now does it?) I did feel pretty good about the effort. I had to go to my partner on one call. I took a direct hit in the mask/face. no ill effect but I was unsure if ball hit batter's bat knob or hand or what so I went to my partner after calling "time". He said he had a ball hitting batter's knob of bat so I called a foul and directed scorekeeper to add one strike to count. Home coach questioned us but we had it right. I went to him right away and then kid then got a hit with an RBI so nobody had anything else to say about it.

It felt GOOOOOOOD to work high quality baseball again. Whew! I dont' suck on toast tonight. LOL!

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I see the quote in my above post, but maybe I botched it somehow.

It was a post you made in this thread:

http://umpire-empire...8597#entry88597

I got the majority of my chuckles when you wanted to remind your assignors about NOT doing 60' ball. Then, 5-6 weeks later, you got roped into it because you had the itch to get on the diamond.

I think it's easy to get down on yourself doing this type of ball, at least for me it is. No matter how hard you try, there are going to be people yelling about Smitty doing a better job, with his made up mechanics/rules, and being everyone's friend during the game.

That said, it makes me feel a little bit better when I read a big dog's account of the bizzaro-world that non-shaving ball can be.

Glad to hear you haven't lost the touch for good. :)

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I find it almost impossible to come out of these games feeling good about myself. I've about come to the realization that it's impossible to do a good job on these games because you've got to steal strikes wherever you can which, at least for me, leads to inconsistency. And then the constant whining of the parents and coaches just irritates the crap out of me.

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I find it almost impossible to come out of these games feeling good about myself. I've about come to the realization that it's impossible to do a good job on these games because you've got to steal strikes wherever you can which, at least for me, leads to inconsistency. And then the constant whining of the parents and coaches just irritates the crap out of me.

Yep, I'm getting kind of tired of them as well.

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I find it almost impossible to come out of these games feeling good about myself. I've about come to the realization that it's impossible to do a good job on these games because you've got to steal strikes wherever you can which, at least for me, leads to inconsistency. And then the constant whining of the parents and coaches just irritates the crap out of me.

Yep, I'm getting kind of tired of them as well.

I called batter's interference a few games ago at the 12U level. Batter swung and stepped right over the plate and got in the way of F2's throw to second. They didn't retire R1, so I call the batter out and return R1 and from the stands, a mom says in her best whiney voice, "He has a right to finish his swing!" Gotta love the rule expert moms.

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I find it almost impossible to come out of these games feeling good about myself. I've about come to the realization that it's impossible to do a good job on these games because you've got to steal strikes wherever you can which, at least for me, leads to inconsistency. And then the constant whining of the parents and coaches just irritates the crap out of me.

Yep, I'm getting kind of tired of them as well.

I called batter's interference a few games ago at the 12U level. Batter swung and stepped right over the plate and got in the way of F2's throw to second. They didn't retire R1, so I call the batter out and return R1 and from the stands, a mom says in her best whiney voice, "He has a right to finish his swing!" Gotta love the rule expert moms.

Maybe little Johnny should learn how to swing the bat properly without losing his balance and stepping over the plate.:)

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Welcome (or re-welcome) to Rec ball. Maybe not great baseball, skill wise, but always entertaining. Because the players always come up with a new way to mess something up or the parents throw out great bits of information to help the umpire.

"It hit the ground before it hit him. He can't be awarded first"

My favorite is the dropped ball on the IFF. Mass confusion!

I have more problems with whiners in Select/travel ball then rec ball. Most of those in Rec ball don't expect much skill wise or umpire wise and when the get an experienced umpire who knows the rules and can help his partner who is in his 1st year of umpiring, they seem to appreciate it.

But that's just me and where I work.

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Welcome (or re-welcome) to Rec ball. Maybe not great baseball, skill wise, but always entertaining. Because the players always come up with a new way to mess something up or the parents throw out great bits of information to help the umpire.

"It hit the ground before it hit him. He can't be awarded first"

My favorite is the dropped ball on the <acronym title='Infield fly'>IFF</acronym>. Mass confusion!

I have more problems with whiners in Select/travel ball then rec ball. Most of those in Rec ball don't expect much skill wise or umpire wise and when the get an experienced umpire who knows the rules and can help his partner who is in his 1st year of umpiring, they seem to appreciate it.

But that's just me and where I work.

+1. In fact, I can honestly say that the ONLY problems I have are select/travel. The rare jacka$$ in rec ball is easily handled and dismissed, school ball is a breeze, even adult/seniors are ok if you show just a little tact. But it's the SuperCoach Daddy in travel ball that seems to common everywhere. They know it all, they paid hundreds/thousands in equipment and fees, so clearly they're entitled to every call.

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I do Varsity high school down to 9U travel ball. I thoroughly enjoy good baseball. Sometimes it's hard to feel good behind the plate when BOTH members of the battery on BOTH teams suck. I find myself literally begging, "C'mon kid. Pleeeezzeeeee throw a strike." I do it for the cameraderie. I do it for love of the game. I do it to protect the integrity and respect of the game. The $ is great, too. Mostly, though, I do it because when I'm NOT on a ball field, I feel out of place. I BELONG on the diamond. My wife says baseball is my mistress. She's right.

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I guess all good things come to those who work without expectations other than to try and do the best you can for yourself and the game. I was just notified that in my first year of high school ball in the great state of Kansas, (several in Kentucky with a two year break for Afghanistan duties) I was selected to work in the KSHSAA 6A Regional in Olathe. I am honored and humbled. I was only able to work 7 high school dates this year and was chosen for this tournament. I cannot wait for Wednesday to come. 3 man crews. I give thanks to God and good partners. And my assigner---Thanks Mike.

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