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It's your fault, umpire-empire! :)


aiber
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For me, the key is, was the interaction conversational or confrontational? There is a big difference. I have had some rather heated 'conversations' with coaches that nobody else could overhear, we got the issues settled and we moved on. Now those could have become confrontations, of course, and then you deal with them differently. 

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The next half inning as he is taking his position he approaches me and asks, "Blue, was I really out?".

@aiber......Just out of curiosity, where were you between innings and what position was he playing? Was it before the inning? After F1 completed his warmup pitches?

I was walking from C to shallow right field as I always do. He was the shortstop.

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Huh?

Larry doesn't want you to react, that's all.

 

However, ....  in between innings ......I don't see a big deal to walk out to right field.   Teams are exchanging from fielding to hitting ....and YOU as an umpire aren't holding anyone up, ....and no one is watching you.   This, and only this,.... I feel, is an "OK" time to walk to your position.   Every other time ..... you're jogging/running.

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aiber,

 

First of all, relax and take a breath.  When you post on an umpire forum and ask a question such as "did I overreact?", you're going to get answers.  Be a little more thick skinned, listen to the responses, ignore the ones you don't like and file the ones you do like away for later.

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aiber,

 

First of all, relax and take a breath.  When you post on an umpire forum and ask a question such as "did I overreact?", you're going to get answers.  Be a little more thick skinned, listen to the responses, ignore the ones you don't like and file the ones you do like away for later.

Thanks for the advice. Being a high school principal, believe me I am thick skinned. I have to admit, though, that I do not tolerate ignorant people and statements very well. However, your point is duly noted.

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aiber,

 

First of all, relax and take a breath.  When you post on an umpire forum and ask a question such as "did I overreact?", you're going to get answers.  Be a little more thick skinned, listen to the responses, ignore the ones you don't like and file the ones you do like away for later.

Thanks for the advice. Being a high school principal, believe me I am thick skinned. I have to admit, though, that I do not tolerate ignorant people and statements very well. However, your point is duly noted.

As a principal you probably wouldn't tell a parent who's in your office to shut up. When you post stuff on here, expect to get all feedback. In the end it helps all of us get better by talking through stuff on here so we can figure it out on the field. It will get better w/ experience.

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aiber, First of all, relax and take a breath.  When you post on an umpire forum and ask a question such as "did I overreact?", you're going to get answers.  Be a little more thick skinned, listen to the responses, ignore the ones you don't like and file the ones you do like away for later.

Thanks for the advice. Being a high school principal, believe me I am thick skinned. I have to admit, though, that I do not tolerate ignorant people and statements very well. However, your point is duly noted.As a principal you probably wouldn't tell a parent who's in your office to shut up. When you post stuff on here, expect to get all feedback. In the end it helps all of us get better by talking through stuff on here so we can figure it out on the field. It will get better w/ experience.

I think that it is well documented that I know that I should not have told the player to "shut up".

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As High School Principal you don't tolerate ignorant people or statements? So you don't like Teenagers? Games worked 24

Do you know what "tolerate" means? It doesn't mean that I don't like them? I love kids. I do not condone unacceptable behavior.

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As High School Principal you don't tolerate ignorant people or statements? So you don't like Teenagers? Games worked 24

Do you know what "tolerate" means? It doesn't mean that I don't like them? I love kids. I do not condone unacceptable behavior.

Apparently you are wound a little tight and can't tolerate a little humor. I won't post on your comments anymore. Have a great day.

Games worked 24

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Read "Verbal Judo"!  It will change your life!  As an umpire, as a principal, as a husband, and a father.  As a novice umpire, my approach to confrontation and conversation has COMPLETELY changed since reading this book, applying game experiences, and reading the advice here.  Players and coaches are going to have some emotion in the game - some more than others, especially on what they feel is a close play.  Cool diplomacy will reap better results with all persons involved with the game.  Sometimes you have to understand why they are saying what they are saying as frustration is to be expected that they didn't get the bang (unless it is defamatory, of course).  If he said this calmly, or with a tired face and walking away, then no big deal - same things with coaches; they may not agree, but oh well.  However, when they approach you with confrontational body language and anger, this must be shut down - not as a way of displaying your alpha maleness, but as a way to get things under control before they get any worse.  If they don't respond to your honest attempts to get the conversation under control, then it's time for them to go.  Personality management with the ongoing learning curve of properly applying rules in a game have been my biggest focus. 

 

Great question and best of luck to you in your future games!

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I find that, when faced with a confrontation, it's very helpful for me to take a deep breath, collect my thoughts, and decide how I'm going to address the issue before I open my mouth at all.  Having a repertoire of go-to phrases helps a lot as well (ie. "that's enough", "knock it off", "I understand that you saw the play differently, but I had _____", ect.).  It can be hard to control your emotions during a confrontation, but it's easier to avoid saying something you regret if you "stick to the script".

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Remember, never say anything to a player or coach that will get them tossed for saying to you.

 

Thanks for that statement. A game changer for me.

 

Have heard more than one partner go all "you" and "your" with a coach, and then a few sentences later I hear my partner audaciously ask the same coach, "Did you just say, 'You'?" as if the coach just committed a felony (yes, I have read the ongoing discussion on the other thread about "you" and "your" and whether they are inherently personal--not my point). Managing difficult people in difficult situations--that's why we're there. Guiding as many of them successfully through the fog as we can--that's job security for us.  Great thread, this.

 

Sidebar--there's a huge old Victorian mansion in Astoria, Oregon (mouth of the Columbia River). The owner had just one valuable skill for which he charged loads--he'd take a small craft a few miles off the coast and hop onto a cargo ship and successfully pilot the ship a few miles across the dangerous river bar, and then be dropped off on the other side. Made millions getting people successfully through just 1/2 mile of ocean.

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High School Game and I have the bases. Ground to 2B but close play and I call him out. Runner stops, looks at me and asks me, "Are you serious?"...I ignore him...he keeps on chirping throughout his team's AB and looking over at me from the dugout. The next half inning as he is taking his position he approaches me and asks, "Blue, was I really out?". I turn to him and say, "Shut up!" and he does. His next AB, he grounds out to third and the play was not close. Right after I call him out he says, "I made it easy for you". I toss him!

Did I overreact?

Never use the phrase "Shut up". Nobody likes it. But no, you didnt over react. You gave him a chance to cool off. He made it personal by saying "I made it easy for YOU".

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